The Ableism of Sex

Richard showed this too me last night and I am quiet flabbergasted on why this even on trial

The body of the link



Judge bans man with low IQ from having sex


By Martin Beckford, The Daily Telegraph February 4, 2011



A man with a low IQ has been banned from having sexual intercourse by a High Court judge who admitted the case raised questions about "civil liberties and personal autonomy".

The 41 year-old had been in a relationship with a man with whom he lived and told officials "it would make me feel happy" for it to continue.

But his local council, which provides his accommodation, decided his "vigorous sex drive" was inappropriate and that with an IQ of 48 and a "moderate" learning disability, he did not understand what he was doing. It started legal proceedings to restrict the relationship.

A psychiatrist involved in the case tried to prevent the man being given sex education, on the grounds that it would leave him "confused".

Mr Justice Mostyn said the case was "legally, intellectually and morally" complex as sex is "one of the most basic human functions" and the court must "tread especially carefully" when the state tries to curtail it.

But he agreed that the man, known only as Alan, should not be allowed to have intercourse with anyone on the grounds that he did not have the mental capacity to understand the health risks associated with his actions.

Under the judge's order, the man is now subject to "close supervision" by the local authority to ensure he does not break the highly unusual order. The judge concluded: "Alan does not have the capacity to consent to and engage in sexual relations.

"In such circumstances it is agreed that the present regime for Alan's supervision and for the prevention of future sexual activity is in his best interests."

It is the latest controversial case to come before Britain's Court of Protection. Under the Mental Capacity Act 2005, its judges have the power to make life-or-death decisions for people deemed to lack the intelligence to make them for themselves - such as ordering that they undergo surgery, have forced abortions, have life-support switched off or be forced to use contraception.

In the latest case, the man known as Alan was described as being physically able but "seriously challenged in all aspects of his mental functionality". He lived in a home provided by the council, where he developed a sexual relationship with a man called Kieron by the court. Alan was also accused of making lewd gestures at children in a dentists' surgery and on a bus, although no police action was taken.

The town hall began court proceedings in 2009 to restrict contact with Kieron on the grounds that he lacked mental capacity, and an interim order was made.

"Since then Alan has been subjected to close supervision to prevent any further sexual activity on his part," said the judge.



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This entire thing rubs me the wrong way. Lets bring up a few things. First off, the trial reads simply "Ew! Gay retards are having sex ew!" It's complete aversion to the idea that "Alan" is interested with having a sexual relationship with his another person (let alone a man) NEWS FLASH!!People with intellectual abilities, developmental delays, mental illnesses and brain injuries are not non sexual people! I know this is a shock to all you able body folks here but guess what, sex isn't just for able people. And the idea that Alan wants to have a sexual relationship with a peer isn't something deviant.

Now I know people are wondering "but what if he lover is not in the same developmental range as Alan wouldn't he be taking advantage of him?" Richard and I inferred that they met in an assisted living situation and they are both adults with intellectual disabilities. I have yet to see any information that is contrary. Until that information is presented.

I am gonna say this is rather fucked.

Ignorance (NSFW)

Ok kiddies it's another NSFC/W post on sex. Those under 18 are not permitted to read.















So I wrote a post back in October about sex and orgasm. This is also about sex but a short post on the idealism that sex is more that just male-centric that it's also able-centric. The idea of disabled adults with amputations, deafness or some sort of mental illness having sex is considered dirty or even fetishistic. I have been around enough "hentai" and "yaoi" groups to notice that there is such thing as an amputation fetish. Is it wrong? No it's not wrong to have a fetish but to treat those people as a just a kink and not 'people' is.

What is even more disturbing is the social belief that those with developmental delays are unsexual beings and live in perpetual childlike innocence. That they will never understand sex and it is fruitless to have a conversation about sex to them. Of course many will figure it out on their own and sometimes in the worse sort of ways. Parents are also disgusted at the thought of their sons or daughters masturbating and will try to correct this 'deviant' behavior. Never mind the fact that if a typical teen masturbates, most parents will do is roll their eyes and shut the door. Yes masturbation is stigmatized for all neurotypes but it seems that those with atypical neurologies get punished for it more than those with neurologies that are accepted.

This infantilizting of people with DD including autists is very detrimental and continued to assert the ablelism that only healthy normal people enjoy and have sex. Autistic people having sex is gross, severally autistic people interested and even having sex themselves is wrong and bad. It's continuing to enforce sexual ignorance among my social group and continuing the schism between between typical and atypical. It also suggests the idea that, autistic people and DD people...can't consent to sex. Therefore it's wrong.

I find this troubling in many levels.

Media doesn't resolve this problem. Picoult's book House Rules has Jacob Hunt being asexual and even aromantic (which is another believe that HFA autistics have no idea of romantic love let alone severe autists) Jacob admits that he might have love Jess however. I feel that was just shoving the dagger a bit deeper really and into an Adam-esq feeling of: "You may love the girl but you'll never have her". Elizabeth Moon, did this too but she made Lou a sexual being. Lou narrates in "Speed of Dark" that he wants to take his love interest out and even make love to her. This defiantly suggests that Lou enjoys and wants sex (I have feeling though that Moon made him a virgin).

The idea that sex between two consenting atypical adults should be normalize. Is one that many people can't seen to fathom. Mostly because consent seems to be a "normal" thing. Autistic and DD people can't consent.

We should abolish this, sex is a choice. A choice that all people should have and not be judge for it. Autists should have the right have sex, or not have sex. Not every autist is asexual.

Relief and the good kind of overload...

It was wonderful, this feeling of drowning in pleasure. Like an overload when things are too much. It is too much..but then relief, if someone open the lid of a bubbling pot and let the steam out. I feel exhausted but not unhappy. I like this feeling of being overwhelmed and then getting that relief. I want the pot to bubble up again so I can free the steam.


OK kiddies this is an adult only post. All you little ones under 18 need to skedaddle.

Opening fiction is Tikaani describing what an orgasm feels like to him. Tikaani's sexuality for a long time is mostly masturbation and various experiments with what turns him on. It isn't until he is around his mid-twenties does he experience intercourse.

For many autists out there, this is very familiar. We're all have fondle ourselves and tried to figure out how get that certain sensation many find it and enjoy it some don't, and for some, intercourse is far away while others have found it and appreciate the experience. Now not all autist are sexual. Some are very asexual for many reasons. Sometimes the sensations are overwhelming and not the good way, some actually hurt. Though it is a lie that autists even "Purple" autists are not sexual or have no concept of sex.


Sex for me is very wonderful thing. I will not tell you all of my sexual habits but release is actually helpful and helps me reorganize thoughts and center me sensory-wise. I feel better and often sleep better. In one experiment fiction with Tikaani he also compares orgasm to using the restroom. It is refreshing and relieves a pressure and need. In some sense sex including masturbation, is form of bodily release, though not completely necessary (like using the toilet or eating) it does serve a very functional purpose.

Problem is many autists are curious but unsure how to approach sex and some are very shy and with the right-wing pro-christian agenda, exploring one's sexuality is often discouraged and for some autists breaking those rules are often hard to do (It was for me when I was Christian) so many are ignorant on many aspects of sex and it poses a host of challenges.

First off, many don't know what their boundaries are and that can cause a lot of problems. They might preform a sexual act and injure themselves (I have done this). Or not know what tools many help them explore their sexuality safely. Many might not understand contraceptives or might be too paranoid about them which causes a lot of unwanted anxiety (Was paranoid about getting pregnant until I got an IUD and I didn't sleep or cry because of said anxiety). We shouldn't leave young autists to figure things out via internet. It's unreliable and irresponsible. Parents however don't have the responsibly alone to teach their child about the finer points of 'insert tab A into slot B' peers and dear friends of autistic people should also help educate and assure autistic people that experimenting and doing it safely is ok. Especially since many teens and young adults of any neuro-type, don't always feel comfortable asking parents about sex and what feels good. Friends shouldn't laugh or look at their autistic friend oddly for asking questions about masturbation or what a g-spot is. Nor should they dismiss them with 'Go wiki/google it' it's unhelpful and creates distrust.

Autistic people of all colors should have the freedom to explore their sexuality without fear of being reprimanded by parents or mocked by peers. Parents and peers and other autistic friends that have experience should pitch and encourage that need to...let the steam out.