April 2: Words can hurt you

Words can damage and hurt and ways people can't always see. This illustration shows the pain of what words can do to you. Especially...that word.

[sticks and stone can break my bones but words can always hurt me.

The problem with having so many ableist and gendered insults in our language is that we know none of them are appropriate but we still use them anyway. I have slung around the word "idiot" and "moron" all the time. We know that those words are not as destructive as "retard" or "freak" or any a myriad of the prolific patronizing words we slather on kids with DDs. I've heard them all.

Trying to cut back on ableist insults feels like a never ending climb. And many of use will resist with with saying "well I can't understand why people just don't ignored them." Ahhhh yesss abled privilege. Classic. The deal is though it's not like were "sensitive" or "over emotional". Words weight on us, and sink into us. Sometimes we had enough and we get upset over one more "You're such a retard." sometimes...like myself. You realize people have called you the R-word so many times. That you have become desensitized. Numb. The word doesn't hurt anymore because you start to believe it slowly but surely.

Yeah. I am the fucking retard.

words can damage and destroy, it can undo what has been done. For World Autism Awareness day I want people to be aware of the language the use. Both, obviously destructive and patronizing.

April 1: Autism Acceptance

Day one of the April_Drawing challenge



I had plans for this to be Tikaani but instead I tried another fictional autie of mine. Wilson.

Notes for today:
Autism acceptance today for me is more than being proud of my alter-neurology but something a little more broader. It's accepting the fact that I do have pervasive, and sometimes obstructive disability. It's the reason I have hard time keeping relationships (including my marriage) keeping a job, and many other things (like learning to drive). It's part of me, part of my identity88 part of my nature. It's not something I can remove or alter for long. Accepting one's disability and finding ways to not "conquer it" but to live with it. I think every diagnosed autist out there has those moments when your dad's 9mm in the closet up in the bedroom, seems to be a pretty decent cure. Afterall your disability won't haunt you when you're dead. But that is not the solution. Accepting yourself and who you are, will give you more comfort than fighting an uphill battle.

To me it's not about society accepting the fact that I am an autist. But myself accepting that I am autist.

To quote RuPaul, "If you can't love yourself, how the hell can you love somebody else?"