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Wednesday, December 9, 2009

The kitsune illusion and thoughts on priviledge

Foxes were thought to live lives much like people, and in art they often interact with each other in a partially anthropomorphic form, standing on two legs and wearing clothes. But to enter the world of humans they had to look completely like them, as foxes caught trying to trick people with disguises would be severely punished, and often wound up in soup. A fox wishing to transform itself had many special techniques at its disposal, such as placing a human skull on top of its head and praying to the Big Dipper. A careless fox might still leave elements of its anatomy unchanged beneath its clothes, usually a tail but sometimes fur and paws as well, and sometimes it was thus discovered.

From Kitsune entry on Obakemono

Pretending to be normal is hard work. It's constant struggle to keep the illusion that you are human and not a 'fox'. My ears appear sometimes and my tail and I will always be a fox. But I have to disguise myself as a human to live happily. 

The illusion of normalcy is a guise that HFA wear often. We have too. It's not a choice that some may want, but it's a choice we preform on a regular basis in order to survive. For some it's tasking and over whelming. For others, it's gets wary after a long while many are tired of being "human". Misanthropy is a common side-effect. 

I used the allegory of the "kitsune" to demonstrate a point that being what you are not is not easy and not simple either. Normalcy is what many want to achieve, and those autists are blind-sided by the idea that 'normal makes everything better' or better than being autistic. Some that live highly complex and impaired lives and understandably, having that impairment lessen would be tremendous. I know this well as someone that deals with depression and mania as well as anxiety. Having those qualities  removed would be tremendous. However I feel that many are naive to assume that us "ninja autists" live easy and impairment-free lives. That is not the case. I am not living an easy life because I can handle sensory information better or being verbal. Even Ari probably has disability in his life too. But he works hard in keeping it in check all the time while public. He even states in articles that it's exhausting. Why do people have this delusion that Aspies don't struggle like LFAs do? Whilst we lack many difficulties, our problems are on the same page. We struggle to process information, we have cognitive functioning issues, we have sensory issues and we have a hard time communicating. Our problems are different but not any less valid. While I believe no one is disagreeing that. I feel that people don't understand how hard it is some times to be "human" when you're a "fox". 

Of course this is "old meme" and every parent has heard it before but I just thought I should give my two pennies about it.

Now on a different matter but on the same hand. What the hell is with all this privilege? I was reading this post on Kim's blog and it brought up a thought that I talk a lot about and even mentioned on my old "Fucking Ethics" essay. 

Why are NT's so gung ho in throw their privilege around? Why do parents always seem to assume what they want is what their child wants? As I stated in several blogs. I am pro-choice. I am neither anti or pro cure. Why? Because cure is such a loaded word and it has several meanings for some people. For some it means to speak for others it means not to be loaded with sensory information to the point of chronic overload. It's personal. Therefore it should be the choice of the autist. Problem is that we either have hierarchy or NT Privilege making statements and judgments that reek of ableism or disconnect. The thing that I see a lot of are parents (namely NT) that never confer or talk to their older autistic child about treatment or cure or the parents of younger ones who have this Holy Grail kind of goal and don't try to break it down. They need to realize eventually your son or daughter is going to have opinions of their own? What will you do when your child says: 'I don't want this program/diet/medicine anymore?' Or inverted. What will you do when your child asked to be cured? How will you go about that anti-cure parents? 

On the other side. Aspies need to STFU up when they say, "oh no cure for us HFA but them LFA need it." No. Not your choice either. I should be the person choice of individual not the heard. Especially when you do say that your basically taking a huge dump on the rights and awareness of of other 'Purple' autists and furthering the massive disconnect between they spectrum ends. Stop it. Also, while I shouldn't bitch at this. LFA's that want cure shouldn't be frowning at the LFA that use aug communication or have been institutionalized and don't want to be cured and are happy as is. Really when I say it's personal it's personal. In some context if an Aspie wants a cure then I hope he finds it. It's not going stop me from shaking my head in pity though. But I will wish him the best.

I think cure is too personal to be decided by a group or an observer. 

Also. I will get a picture of Tikaani up for everyone to say thanks for the donations <3


  1. Cure is such a loaded term. If we stuck to more neutral terms and ideas like helping individuals live their lives so that they are fulfilled, satisfied, valued, safe, no one could be against that.

    Cured: there's a cure for Downs Syndrome: abortion of the fetus. I don't want that kind of cure for autism. That's one of the things I think of when I hear cure in relation to autism. Cured: the loss of the individual's personality. That's the other thing I think of. If autism is a fundamental difference at the genetic, chromosomal, cellular and neural levels of the brain, then curing would mean a fundamental alteration of the person. I'm not for that either.

    Lessening the symptoms that create misery for the autistic individual (for any individual): yes.

    Respecting the right of my children to gain autonomy over their lives as they grow and to have a say in the treatments they receive: yes. We explain everything. Of course, my children aren't on medications to deal with any of their behaviors; they don't get ABA. So, I don't have to explain a lot, at least regarding that.

    Am I trying to mold them into NTs. Nope. Sounds dreadfully boring and I'm sure I don't fit there. Am I trying to help them navigate the world easier? Yes. Do I explain as I go? Yes.

    I want them to love themselves, to take pride in the things they do well and to accept that we all have issues we must struggle with. The trick is to find a way to struggle with those issues with grace.

    gonna crosspost at Countering, too.

  2. I just want people to be able to live the lives they want. Right now I am not and I don't know if support/accommodations would make a difference or if alleviating my symptoms would. I don't have either so I don't truly know.

  3. @Stephanie

    Maybe that is something you should look to. I need accommodations and support (government and what not) Maybe look into see if the board of DD in your county can lessen any of your needs like getting you to appointments and helping you budget for food.

  4. @NightStorm

    I'm on the waiting list for DDSN in my county. I don't know how long I'll be on it, it has already been almost a year. For all I know it could take 10 years.